I have no idea how this is gonna play out.   Got frustrated with the Mama-kat and decided I would apply what I think needs done across the spectrum of other problems in the world.   ACCOUNTABILITY.

Mama was just loungin’ around the stead, feelin’ good with herself, and I was the one takin’ care of the babbie,,,  Uh-uh,,, I didn’t get knocked up, this is HER issue.   And I decided it was time to let nature take its course and I will just deal with whatever direction that takes.  

I took the babbie out to her, her out lounging in the driveway, and I layed the babbie right on her belly, saying, “your baby, you deal with her, you have the equipment,”

and walked away.

So far so good,  She is acting more motherly out there, and more than a tad nervous out in the open with a weak helpless dependent.      I did intervene for a quick minute when she got all confuzzed when it started raining, but I did NOT bring her back in the house.   I took the baby, leading Mama, under the carport and just left the baby in a dry spot.

and walked away.

Well, the rain kept a coming.

20 minutes, a small lull in the downpour

and here comes Mama, carrying babbie in her teeth and straight to the nest she had laid out.    

and there she is still.  I hope I kicked the proper hormones back into place by pushing the issue in a ‘danger zone’.   Dunno, playing with instincts can be tricky, but I have no other options short of spending mad cash on kitten formula ($40 a can!!! roughly the same size as a human baby formula can.)   I will if need be, but I want things done ‘naturally’ here.  

and its gonna sound harsh, but if that means the babbie dies, then thats what it means.    Maybe there is some reason Mama is rejecting her, something that is out of my sense range,,, I dunno.     I don’t wanna bury another kitten; I’ve already buried Grizz and the other two kits mama had.   Too many graves in one week.

But I also have to accept the fact that if there is a developmental problem with this babbie and mama senses it and is rejecting her,,,,

No easy choices,,, sometimes there are no choices, you just have to deal.

Sometimes a man has to put down his own dog: Don’t dally, don’t farm it out, just do it and move on.  

paraphrased from Heinlein.

Where to start with this’un,,,,

always start at the start, right? Yeah,,

Mamakat, babbies, lost two,, has one now and keeping her attention on it is wearing this grumpy ol’fart OUT.
The problem being (I THINK) that she lost the majority through issues or accident and now, her hormones have kicked into other modes and she is in heat again. TOO SOON. She keeps running off, chasing Zoomie lookin’ for nookie. Poor little rat of a kitten is left alone for HOURS AND HOURS ON END, I have been holding her to my chest to keep her warm enough, trying to make sure her ‘nest’ is warm when I can’t, and bottle feeding her through the day because I can’t keep Mama nearby enough to keep her focused on her duties.

Mirror that to some of the issues within our society these days. Mama Drama as its been called in some circles. A welfare system that rewards extra/pre-marital child rearing, destruction of Family Unit integrity that creates multitudes of feral children, dead beat dads, and has been doing so for at least a couple of generations,,, I can think of two people in my current spheres that have NO CLUE who Daddy is, and I am not talking who ‘the’ daddy is, but THIER daddy,,, Not a clue, never met the bastard, don’t wanna meet the bastard ’cause he was never around to begin with. Nopes, Why bother with that asshole when Unca Sugah has taken care of them from the start of memory.
NOTE, I am not talking race here, this isn’t a racial issue, its a societal issue that has come about thanks to GOVERNMENT INTERVENTION. That evil created with the best of good intentions,,, the black eye in the white fish in the Yin-Yang symbol.

And I think there are those in power that KNOW the damage done, may have even had some part of it, and encourage it because it helps maintain some agenda,,,,

Yeah, total prospiracy thinks there, bear with me,,,,

Whether that is the case or not, the reality of the damage being waged is real. I may be dealing with wayward mamakat in my household, but what about the tens of thousands of mama-people on the dole popping out babies for a check every month. I know it has created a new trend of kids being raised by granparents because the biological ones aren’t capable or responsible enough to manage it. I know of adoptions within family lines to keep the child with family, because the mother is so far gone mentally, she is barely able to function as an adult.
Is this just because of the welfare system? Could this be a symptom of our Public education system as well? I say YES, but I am just one voice in the wilds of this country. I am also (mostly) self-educated, in no small part because I found my former education was horribly lacking. I find that most aren’t interested in educating themselves ‘because I learned all I needed in school”: a horrid myth created by the monster to perpetuate the disease.

Destroy the Family. Destroy the education. Destroy the faiths. Destroy the Culture. All planks straight out of Marx and Trotsky. (and i was appalled when the Lawyer student that I mentioned in another post, brought up Trotsky as if he were some Paragon of thought,,,, It made me stumble more than a little,,, The ROT goes very deep in our world.)

Where is the solution? Take it back down to base principles, Keep things as localized as possible. And I fear that isn’t possible anymore. I see ‘theories” like Distributionism and they sound good, and thats the problem; they ‘sound’ good, hit all the right emotions of a people scratching for a solution, but when rubber meets the road,,, While its obvious that top down corporatism isn’t working, bottom up localized economies probably won’t either, not in this technology age. I could be wrong here, not seeing some aspect or other. Honestly, its that whole Heinlein paradigm about ‘Who Decides’ (sorry, can’t find it fast on net, and don’t feel like looking through the novels,,) thinking that a small group is better at deciding what right or wrong, or that democratic societies are better,,, Things don’t work that well in application, and EVERY Democratic society commits suicide eventually,,, Apparently so do Republics, usually by becoming ‘democratic’. Some would say there is some merit to Monarchy, but then, we don’t have a representative God to make that decree, nor would 90% of society agree with it. Actually, that whole idea gives me giggle fits,,,

Dunno,,, the future looks bright, but is obsured by the clouds of the past burning down around us. What was, may come back in small ways; we are a nostalgic creature that never wants to let go the past. And what will come will be as hodge-podge as the last ‘experiment’, and human nature will be the ever lasting ‘fuck you’ to any with high ideals. That is the only thing I DO KNOW, we aren’t widgets that you can move around on a chess board and say “THIS”,,,, We wander as we will and for everyone that thinks as you, there are 20 with other ideas.

Keep on livin’/lovin’

Was just out’n’bout, had a dinner at my fave Chinee buffet, (you’d think I would be 300+# as much as I like the stuff,, Nopes, holding that 200# mark still) and they were runnin’ the Communist News Network (Chinese place, DUH!)  and I saw an ad for an upcoming show about NukeLEEarWAHHRRRRRR!!!!   and about spit out a mouthful of Lo-mein when the doggeral hit my brainium of how they were trying to spin it.

First off, not many NORMIES are aware that the Russians are playing a game (they are calling it a training exercise) near the Carribean.   And this isn’t something like what we saw back in the Sixties,,, they are/will be in International Waters so completey Legit: can’t touch them and make demands,,,  No Cuban Missile crisis to help give Ol’Slooooooo-Joe his “JFK” moment of glory.   

BUT, the Commie News peeps are playing that ‘Get your shit ready, the Russians are coming, the Russians are coming’ and playin’ on old fears,,, they were even displaying old Soviet Union memorabilia to dig the hooks of propaganda DEEP. 

But not one person on that side of the screen is saying the one thing that I have been saying since the Whole UkraineKoked-outKlownKar started up.   STOP POKING THE BEAR AND YOU WON’T GET YOUR FUCKING FACE RIPPED OFF.

Ahh,,,, but that doesn’t keep the owners and investors of the MIC happy does it.  GOTz ta keep the war machine rolling or LockheedMartin and the others start losing share value.   “Eeek! my profit margins are shrinking,, I can’t live with the dirt people, you gotta fix this,,, BOMB someone dammit!!!“

Good Dog, I hope I am not the only one that can see through the bullshit.  It was damned near Freshman level Prop I was seeing, so blatantly over the top in trying to drive a certain ‘patriotic’ vibe from the Cold War era,,,,   Honestly, I felt like it was 1983 again for just a moment: except I was looking at a OLED Flat screen TV, not some Giant Projection Screen TV, and there are liver spots on my hands now along with a shit ton of scar tissue well earned.

For the record, assuming that the informaton about the Russian Hypersonics is accurate, DC is a 10 minute MAX flight from where the Ruskies are gonna be playing games.  Those are 10 minutes for DC to clear out and get in hideyholes,,,, AIN’T GONNA HAPPEN

Actually, that last statement is EXACTLY what I think,,, Nothing is gonna happen, The String pullers in DC are gonna take a step back, make some calls to their counterparts in Russia, do some fast talking and next week, business as usual.    That our $haministration continues to poke the BEAR does not bode well, but I feel HONESTLY that Putin and Krew do NOT want a Hot war with Canned sunshine, anymore than the guy in the street does.   That sort of action is pretty final and LIKELY the absolute last resort tactic on his list of ‘fun’.   We really need to replace the whole shebang with fresh blood that isn’t trying to rule the world from a broom closet 20 floors below the White House.   It is VERY obvious to me that they know the upcomine (S)election cycle is gonna have to swing one way, not the other, and even with the resulting riots of Soros backed cronies contesting it, they’ll have to concede the feild to popular vote or risk a SERIOUS uprising of rightously pissed off AmeriCANS, armed to the teeth, with lists and addresses, and an ax to grind.  I think that is the “why” they keep pushing this Ukraine thing to the point of absolute breakdown: they are out of options and need a hailmary pass to get to the goal zone.

Putin putting his warship in potential harms way is showing ME, that he is dead serious in his statements of “Stop sticking your damned noses in the business of Central Europe and West Asia!!!   Pull the NATO pitbull back and give me a buffer zone and I will back off!”   And his calls to that effect are MORE THAN reasonable in my opinion.

Gee, I sure miss mean tweets, <$2/gl gasoline, and NO WARS,,,,  Oh, and reasonably priced food,,,  Kinda miss that a lot too.

sigh,,,, The world moves on.

I’m at balance again, and holding it without needing to resort to kayaking to get there (though I ain’tagonnagiveup me kayaks, no sir!)  (and oh, how I wish I could share that feeling with the world,,,, Sorry, ya gotta find your own path, but it is so WORTH it.)

carry on, keep on livin’/lovin’    We’ll get through this yet and laugh about it later

sort of a tryppy mornin’

woke in a lucid state, just coming from the dream worlds (Really rilly strange, do not recommend Tex-Mex then going to bed,,,) slowly coming into the real world just starin’ at the insides of my eyelids,,,

Not EXACT images of what I was seeing, but the impressions I recieved seeing them. were the same as looking at Escher’s works.

ONLY, as soon as I tried to ‘take them in’, the image would burst away and leave just some blurry cloud of solid color: reds, blues, some orange-ish not quite brown (I think its called burnt umber,,,,)  Like in quantum states, the observer effects the observed, and sometimes, the observed does the unexpected and changes state: detect a wave, but see a particle.

and then my minds eye recalled THIS,,,

and Escher wasn’t working from nothing there,,,   There is a much older form of that image, one that isn’t completely explained away by contemporary wisdom.    Let me explain what I mean there.  

The image,,,, Called the Flower of Life.

simple enough even if it looks extremely complex.   In reality, its a design any 7 year old with a compass could recreate with some focus and patience.

Whats strange about it is the places it has been found and the the detailed way it was formed in those places.   Some of the finds are quite the enigma of our modern world, appearing to have been laser etched into basalt: yet they are 5000 years old or more.   (and believe me, the Conspiracy theories ABOUND on how they were created.   Those mean little to me; just white noise in the stream of information, to be tucked away until supporting/contradictory information comes along.) 

There is another design that has been ‘haunting’ me of late as well.

This image means lots of things to lots of people, and is so simple, they are all correct.   What it means to me?   The duplicity of life.   Good/Evil, Light/Dark, Life/Death,  etc    And the path through it all is the Between, where the light and dark meet, and that there is a part of the other in each: Even the evil will sometimes do a good thing, and the Good will sometimes do something bad with the best of intentions.

And that path is NEVER a straight line.

Been doing deep dives into Alan Watts, and others and my meditations have started taking on some seriously tryppy bends.    I’ve noted that there are times where I am sitting here at home and suddenly realize, I have been watching a kitten or the runnybabbits playing with ZERO THOUGHTS for over an hour.   

This is NOT like me.   Usually my head is running at 10000rpm, bouncing off the redline, on multiple lines of thought.  But now, my focus isn’t on thought, but NO THOUGHT,

And its working.

This mornings tryppy vision was a reminder; the harder you try to see the path, the harder it is to find.  Let it go, it will find you.    When you are looking in the mirror asking “Who the hell am I?”, say ‘Hi!’ and introduce yourself. (and that  is something I have been doing for years and years and years; The asking ‘who am I?’,,, the introductions have been a more recent thing, but I think it helps.)

But the biggest thing that has been helping is “Forgiveness”.   I mentioned this in a linking post to Ho’oponopono recently.   IN the vid in that post Aarron mentions a bible quote; “Forgive them, for they know not what they do.”   To expand on that, Far too many in this world/reality/illusion of/school for the enlightenment/what ever you wanna call this,,,   Most wander through thier days in a dream state not aware of thier interconnectedness with everyone.  They do things, completely oblivious of downstream consequences, injuries they do to others, scarcities they create in their efforts to ‘stay alive’ in a world full of abundance.    Place rat-poison in a scrub pile to keep the packrats from moving onto your property, kill a neighbors cat when he eats one of those rats, doing what he does: being KAT.   They know nothing of how far reaching thier actions  go: You must forgive them their ignorance and self absorbed nature or you go crazy and they pull you lower down, back into the dream state that is more a nightmare. (yes, I found out what killed my Grizzy,,,)

But mostly, FORGIVENESS of ones self.   You have to let go the things that eat at your soul, the failures you had/did,   Learn from them YES, hold them and coddle them, HELL NO.   To harbor such is to build MORE; like attacts like in this quantum fueled world of illusions.   You want vibrancy, VIBRATE!  You want to keep scraping the dirt looking for gold you will never find: DIG!    Thats where my life is ‘In Between’.   I’m seeing clearer, sharper, but my thoughts are vaguer than ever; its not uncomfortable, but is ‘different’ and taking some getting used to.   Things that bothered me just a month ago aren’t even blips on my radar today.   Things that are bothering me now are seeing others in states that scream “I’m lost in this world” but no one can help them until they put their own feet on the path of help FIRST.    To try and help them only brings bad karma down upon the helper; “No good deed will go unpunished”.  

SO,  I smile, send them a prayer in Ho’oponopono, and go on my way, forgiving myself of being a judgemental shit (I am an INTJ,,, that last is Judgemental)

more laters

Keep on lovin’

And here I was thinking it was earlier,,, bcuz my day was short,   but,  the runnin’  Burnout around for his payday (to make sure I get my gasmonies!!) and this that the others,,,,

ah, but home now, stripped off the grubbies of work and in a pair of shorts and ready to figure out EXACTLY what I wanna do with myself this weekend,,,,

Update on the parts parody,,,   Email came in early (before lunch) that my parts had shipped out,,, Check the site, and see that this parcel wieghs in at 37.8lbs.   MUCH Better than the 12.4 of the last,,,   I am making the assumption that THIS kit is the correct one,

And I am gonna vid me opening the box JUST IN CASE it ain’t.   Not for prosterity or anything, more CYA (cover yon ass)  I will even have a grease pencil for counting the teeth of the gears to make sure ‘we’z good’.

but

that won’t be ’til Twosday,,,,    Good thing I am not stranded with a ‘hicle on jack stands waiting for parts,,, I might get a wee bit perturbed if that were the case.

BUT I am being quite cautious right now with the Buff.   That howling back side is driving me to distraction and I DO NOT TRUST IT currently.   She left me in the lurch once (and a HUGE thanks to y’all for helping pull my derrier out of that little camp fire,,,,) I have no intention of letting her do it twice. (but can’t do a danged thing without those parts in hand)(not totally true, been researching the shit out of Utoobies on proper install,,, and there are some real doozies out there that I watch and shake my head at,,,  but there are enough GOOD ones that make up for the WTF?! ones.)

Anywhoosits, freeday wrap-up, figure me heading out for it and RELAX

So has memes

Keep on livin’

I shipped out the ‘wrong product’ from the supplier yesterday.   They had sent me a Return label in email, and I printed that up and took to the FedEx place.

Waiting on word that they have shipped the correct products out.   twiddle thumbs twiddle thumbs.    Probably NOT going to have them in time for the weekend; in fact, I think I can lay good money on that fact.

Wanna go kayaking instead, but to be completely honest, the sounds I am hearing from the current rear end are troubling me, and I think it will be best to  sit this weekend out.   Gotz ta has wheels through the week and don’t wanna risk another locked up diff while I am trying to rebuild the one that did. 

Heck, I may just get the wirebrushes out and scrub the livin’hell outta that Axle housing and paint the bloody thing.   May as well, its gonna be basically ‘as new’ when I am done with it.

The company had no problems issueing that return label.    I am pretty sure that somewhere in their database is a list of known weights of various products and the one I ordered will be quite a bit more than the one they shipped to me originally.  A simple scan would verify that my complaint was legit without needing picture evidence.  I did send that, just to be safe.

At least it was the correct ratio,,,,  small grin,,,,   (for the curious 41/11   3.73)

Fingers crossed that the loader gets this shit right this time’round. (and a quick check on the website shows ‘Order status, at warehouse’, expected delivery Monday with deliver on Wednesday.  Here’s hoping this “Oops” is on its way out the door and I can get busy.)

Aproximately 80 years ago.    That there are ANY still ambulant enough to even walk in a parade ALONE,,,

The Body count on both sides was staggering, the stories from those there, unbelievable but true, the amount of material literally thrown into an all or nothing gambit; Material that 4  years prior, had not existed.  Material that was on both sides of the planet from home.  

This country geared up for war and was churning out mega-tons of gear, material, ammo, weapons, ships

And of course, an entire generation of MEN. (HT to Ragin’ Dave for the Patton Speech)

Look around you.  Could this Level of Commitment be replicated today?

Even with the increase in population between now and then, I can’t see it.   Our manufacturing base has been gutted for the almighty dollar and bottom line, our People are much much lazier, more sedentary in physiology as well as psychologically.  

And we are much much more tech driven where those guys were used to hard efforts and less than perfect ‘climate controlled’ conditions such as we have grown accustomed.

Admittedly, I had a laugh reading Pattons speech, where he was dogging his ‘boys’ to ‘get this job done so we can hit the Pacific before those Marines take all the glory’,, Dumb Jarhead pride here, The Devil Dawgs kicked butt in that theater.

I knew one man from that war, My Step-dad: Dempsey Ruggles.   He passed away a few years before my mother, and did not actually fight in the war, but was a merchant Marine and had his ship torpedoed out from under him in the Atlantic somewhere between the Canary Islands and Brazil.   He spent quite a time afloat in a life boat with several others of the crew, many of whom did not make it. 

I still hold one of his souvenirs from then.

One of several items;  but the image says all about the time it’s from, no?  He told me that the captain of the ‘Kraut sub’ that torpedoed them, gave each of those on the boat, one of those five pfenny coins, and pointed them to the nearest land they could reach considering weather and current patterns.    Just doing a job, nothing personal.   Far better than surfacing and machinegunning the boats, condemning them all to Davey Jones’ locker.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

That generation is fading into history, I can only hope the legends created that day, do not: in both forms, the personal stories passed down from father to son to son, and the fact that when the call was serious, this Country STOOD UP, and DELIVERED COPIOUS AMOUNTS OF EVERYTHING.

keep on livin’