The hunger pangs weren’t intolerable, but the day made things BAD.   Managed 10 hour workday, dealing with a grumpy gate controller (still not fixed! dangit!) and most of that in the sun.   Drinking mad water and took to pinches of salt to help keep the electrolytes up: still had a pounding headache on the return to shop.  

That makes for a muddle-headed day, and today I needed the clear head.      So I ended up cheating a little: one of those little Mexican Coca-colas and some hard salami.   May have equaled 200 calories total, but man, the effect that had on my headache was amazing.

home: scale shows I shed 2 pounds since this AM.   I’m not going to call that ‘fixed’ or good, as that may have been water weight, and I had been doing some sweating.   BUT, every little bit counts, right?   That headache thing may have been hydration, though I kinda doubt it.   I drank 4 large bottles (48 oz) through the day, but I have never done a fast before so I can’t say for certain HOW MUCH water you burn through when you go into ketosis.   (and I was,   funky breath told me so.)

So, yah, I cheated, but the small amount I ate will digest fast, and I’ll be back in fasting mode before I go to bed.    Keep rolling on.  

I picked on hell of a week to stop eating,,,    (even temporarily).   

More laters,,,   Haven’t had time to catch up on the day in the world.   More like catching up here at home and with SIs, which is FAR MORE IMPORTANT that a bunch of poly-tickians.

added note: My new batteries for the house will be here tomorrow.   I may not post till way late, if at all tomorrow.

Made it to church,,, Water was exceptionally blue today, clear to around 15′ best I could tell.   It drops deep fast in this lake.   Water was warmer than the air by a few degrees, both above 60.    Nice clear skies, gentle winds not gusting hard: good paddle sesh!!!

Guess I’m gonna let the kat out of the bag.    What I mentioned in yesterdays post, without spillin’ it.   I’m trying a 7 day fast.   Not for weight ‘reasons’ perse, but due to aspects of the weight I am carrying.   AND to do a physical ‘reset’: I’m pushing for the autophagy aspects, to clear out all the crap built up inside,

And I am strugglin’ right now.   I’ve been a Coca-cola addict for years and lord are the cravings driving me batshit today.  Honestly, if I can cut those out for a week, I could easily see me staying OFF of them post fast.   Thats really the hardest part for me so far.   Hunger? meh,,, drink some water or black coffee. (allowed in a water fast, just no sugar or cream.)   That coke fiend in me is in full rebellion. 

And that is why I am pushing this.  Years of all that sugar is starting to ‘bear fruit’: a big ugly fruit around the middle that is spreading.    I DO NOT LIKE THAT.  And no, it’s not Vanity: I don’t like how I feel, or that it’s a struggle to bend at the waist, and a number of other things.   I gotta change some things, and me, being me, Go full bore, no holds, (if I waffle on that, the discipline slides hard and fast.)  SO, the notes I am keeping are wieght, obviously, but things like BP, heart rate, Blood O2, and some subjective things, How I feel on three fronts, 1-10 rating: three fronts being physical, emotional, mental clarity.  And I already have my ‘break’fast meal lined up and waiting.  Thats there for the ‘just in case’ event of dizziness or sudden hypoglycemic episode; and the actual end of operations, of course.

Man, I REALLY want a coca-cola,,,    GRRRRRR      

Did it to meself, I did,,,,    Heck, just cutting them out will probably have more long lasting benefits than anything else.   I already eat ‘mostly’ healthy.   Have been doing the OMAD thing for years before it was even a thing, (One meal a day) with few exceptions> (usually when I’m with friends does that get blown up.)    And no, I won’t ever drink the ‘sugar free’ shit.   Sugar is bad enough and the chemical barrage of the sugar free shit would send my liver and kidneys into early retirement; I’m still in need of those organs,,,

Anywhooos,,, coke fiend withdrawals beside the point, I’m doing good, so far.   Not craving food yet, but its only been 24 hours (give or take,,, Last meal was Satyrday eve.)

What a way to start my 57th year orbiting Sol, eh?   Better now than never I guess.

And it’s still early in the process.   I can feel small changes already, like energy is low, but stable.  Thats to be expected when a body is used to running on high fructose corn syrup (the Coca-cola.)   Shouldn’t take long for me to burn through that and start getting into the fatzone (usually within 36 hrs)  THEN, comes the real goal.  

SO, thats the silly kat I had cooped up in a bag yesterday.   Was gonna hold off till it was over and give the full report, with my notes.  BUT, that can still be done, Just wanted to vent ‘out loud’ and smack that Coke-Fiend around a bit before it ‘won’.

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Not KOLD mind you, but 64 degrees in early September is ‘odd’.   And when you are acclimatized to nearer 100,  yah, sweatshirts are the thing,,,

Has a thing goin’ on right now, and I want to talk about it, but, then again, Don’t wanna,,,    I’m thinking this is going to be an after the action sort of confession, not prelims and such.   More on that later, and believe me, TAKING MAD NOTES.

Secondary page: I think I lanced that boil.  Haven’t had a thing to add to it in almost two weeks.   Make of it what you will, but I am at peace with what I wrote.   There is one aspect I still hold close, but only because its a hot button in the world these days.   Doesn’t change my take on it one bit, but I do like having somewhere I can vent and some things said could shutter this place against my wishes.

Still nothing much to talk about.  Another of those moments where I sit to write and “we have already talked about this, from 20 different perspectives and,,,,”   And the muse goes quiet.  Then i sit here looking at blank screen with a half-assed title, try to rework the title to re-interest the muse, and “I gotta headache” from Muse,,,   

Nada, nadafuggin’thing,,,   SOrry all, its just that time of year and I know from reading other pages, I ain’t alone.    Blog slump along with so many other slumps in season; like the J.O.B. slump

Take care y’all,   I’ma tryin’ on this end.

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Learn

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Love

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This is my birth month and I have never liked it.   Not because of the birthing thing, but due to other factors.   Like currently at the J.O.B.,,, slow down time since everybody and their cousin are dealing with ‘Back to School’ and shifts in  programming scheduling: they tend to NOT want work done around their places at times like such.   So, we experiance this lull in work.

Add in Shit tons of rain and foul weather, Holiday daze,

Weak Week to say the leasts.    only sitting on 15 hours and tomorrow is payday,,,, BLECH!!!!

I can say, I saw it coming and made pre-emptive actions accordingly.  Already paid 3 of my 6 bills for the month and can slack a little if need be (that is to say, not pay AS MUCH as usual, but still more than minimum.)

I just don’t like this month,,,   Things start the fall shift in this month, really gaining speed in October, but you can see them now.   I’ve always been a spring/summer soul, and the ‘little death’ of fall winter always makes me a little melancholy, even depressed at times.   Yah, yah,, I know “to everything a cycle of seasons” and all that, but that don’t mean I hasta like it!!!  (and thing I miss from SoCal,, There were seasons, but the shifts were so subtle to this northern boy, that it may as well have been year long summer to me.)(Chances of return to SoCal? NIX-NIL, NEIN!    Until that area can get its collective shit together and oust the eaters in the north OUT, and fix things,,,,)

Yup, Northern boy by birth, but no place I can say I ever really felt I belonged.   Southern Pride, I get it, But I haven’t any, or not enough to claim Dixie as my own.  Hell, I’ve been the rolling stone for far too long, never finding that comfort zone.    Out west was the closest and coastal was almost right, but I was still running on adrenaline and testosterone then: No time to settle.  (and note, I didn’t and still have no love of LA,  I was Orange County where people still had some semblance of sanity.)

Only one facet of comfort has ever been the common denominator: WATER.    Has to have the water near at hand or I am lost,,,     Phoenix as a trial for me the year and half I lived there.   Only thing I found enjoyable there was the heat, but seeing stagnate water sitting in the drainage canals depressed the everloving shit out of me.    Yes, thats what those canals in that city are, DRAINAGE, because when it eventually rains there, that water has to go somewhere.  Thats why you see bridges in the middle of the desert: Flash Flooding is no joke.

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Last night as I was laying down, the smell of rain coming through my window was heavenly.   One of my favorite lakes has the best smelling water I have ever experianced: almost that sharp tang of chlorinated water, but without the chlorine bite.  My sister experianced that when she went kayaking with me the once.   It can’t really be descibed, must be ‘in person’ to get the power of it.   CLEAN is what it advertises, not the slightly fishy smell of most fresh water tribs. 

I love the smell of saltwater too.   Not the tidal spills of the southern coast of the lower 48 so much, but the actual saltspray of the coast.    The tidal spillsI tend to have a sewage smell to them; one recalled well from my days on Parris Island; with all its attending memories LOL    Nothing like a 20 mile boots and utes with full gear hump on a lowtide morning: some waste water treatment plants smell better.

I guess thats why coast front property is so damned expensive while the tidal property is ‘easier’ (though still outrageous compared to my current digs.)

My absolute best memory of coastal living was in North Carolina.   I rented (off season) 1/2 a duplex on Emerald Isle while I was in ‘school’ at Courthouse Bay (Camp LeJuene). Had a wife and kid that wanted to stay with me and the school had no facilities for a punk ass PFC and his kin, so I was granted a small priviledge.    Still had to maintain my barracks status, but I digress.   That house was on coast line (beach front at that) exactly east west.   I could catch sunrises over the water in the morning, and sunsets over water in the evening.  It only worked out that way in the winter months, but it was frellin’ AWESOME.   

And I didn’t know kayaks then,,,   sigh

of all my regrets, and I have a few, finding kayaking so late in life is one.   There is so much to learn about such a simple boat, and a younger me would have explored that realm so much easier than this over the hill beat up carcass I am hauled around in now.    Can’t change history like that, can we?  

Up north, the Inuit will shortly begin putting up the boats for the year.   I won’t, but I will be pulling out the gear for cold water immersions.   I may never need it for that, but it does keep my warmer and drier than my summer stuff.  Even with this having been a slack year for kayaking, I still fly with a boat in the racks.   You just never know when that moment will hit.  

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As you can tell, I haven’t much to talk about right now.   The whole poly-ticks scene is right out as it makes not one lick of sense.    The economy scene is right out as well since we are now in the gravitational pull of currency implosion.  (Look around, you’ll see the signs if you ignore what you are being told vs what is actually happening.) Most of the news is pure distraction as is, and I don’t even want to dive into the rabbit hole of the mulit/fluid gendered insanity.  Yes, its INSANITY and I refuse to see it as anything but now.  I do pity those that were sucked in, but I despise those that sold that bill of bads.

I’m just trying to get along in life and get myself into a position where I can make a move when such time allows.   Where, dunno, don’t care, just want it to happen smoothly, and that requires much simplification on this end of it.   “emptying the cup” again, trim the fat, lighten the load.   

I’ll try to find something less down and maybe more ‘life’ oriented for my next post.    Y’all take care.

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Learn

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Love

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even LLM’s have some common sense (I t’ink,,, LOL) (note: one spoken number per second would be 11 1/2 days,,, )

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4 false starts this AM,,, I don’t really know what I want to say.   May be not enough coffee in the bloodstream…

With all the deep diving I have been into on the religious sides of things, then trying to switch over to something quasi-political,,,   hmmmph,   Let me spell it out how I see it.    ALL OF THE ABOVE might have been good ideas at one time under thier original thinkers, but they have all been co-opted for one purpose: CONTROL.    Now, I must clarify, Marx was a Nuckin’FutJob from the word go IMO.    I’ve read his shit and wonder how anyone could read it and think “this guy is onto something” unless they were closet tyro’s themselves.   Yeshuah, Buddha, the others: Great ideas, stolen and ran with by Tyros.  

Proof is in the puddin’, right?    Since the Red Revolution of Russia to now, Communism/Socialism has killed more people than all the wars of the same time frame.   And only ONE is still ‘functional’ but only by emulating Capitalism.   Cuba is NOT a good example for showing ‘the glory of Communism’, and the proof of that is the media blackout of what is really going on, on tha island.   Oh, information can be found, if one wants to dig for it, but most people are too entrenched in their lives and want someone else to ‘tell it’ to them.  

hmm,,, that lines up well with the whole co-opting religion thing.  And we have had 2000+ years of that, ain’t we?  

“Only those willing to seek the truth,  will know the truth.”

All others will be lead like sheep to the slaughter, and hoo-boy have we had slaughter the last 120 years/2000years.

I’m gonna spin this out a different way.   EVERYTHING IN MODERATION    Much like I found with ‘Green Energy’, Communism can work in small form factor.   Tribalism is about as close as you can get to that.    Everyone working for the whole, no one getting more than ‘fair share’.  Or as the communists creed states, From each according to ability, to each according to need.    (question: Who decides?   Answer that and you start to see the veneer flaking off.)   Green Energy can work for extremely localized needs, like a single household or small farm.   Communism could work in the same way.  Its when you start trying to Scale up that things go all wonky.   Green energy isn’t stable enough to provide the ups and downs of massive infrastructure, Communism loses the cobalt rod of self integrity found in small communities.

yes, I’m a little scatterbrained right now.

I recently stumbled over a video of Two AI discussing a solution to Capitalism without being socialist.   I have yet to watch the entirety of it, but I have already found on issue with it.  HUMAN NATURE.    See, true free market capitalism operates on rules that are naturally based, and Human Nature is what drives those rules.   WE DO NOT HAVE FREE MARKET CAPITALISM no matter what modern economists wanna call it.  We are very much a socialist oriented market these days, with 1/3 or the population on some form of welfare, another 1/3 being on workfare, and maybe half of the last third being the entreprenur that DRIVES free market capitalism.    If that doesn’t make sense to you, please, READ A BOOK(free copy if you want one.), and until it does make sense, Your arguments are bunk.

Human nature is why Communism can never work: people are not cogs or widgets to be moved around and replaced as needed.   We don’t ‘work’ like that.  No one fits any specific niche created by the communist machine.  It will limp along for awhile,  but it WILL fail!!!

One thing about the US Constitution: It does describe a machine, gives a blueprint for it even.   BUT, that machine is only for the Government,, NOT THE PEOPLE.    And yet, that Machine has grown til now, so that its infested everyday life around us.    It shows in how our country went from a Free Market system in the late 1800’s to the growing socialist construction we live under today.    All centered around that little amendment to the Constitution in 1917.

It’s always about control.    points that show such.  CENSORSHIP.   REGULATIONS.   TAXATION.

and thats just a start: the tools get more insidious as the infection grows.

But we Celebrate it in disguise.   We lift a beer and a burger in celebration of “labor”,,,  

note, we never raise a beer and burger to “CRITICAL THINKING”,,,,   just sayin’,,,

more laters,,,

This week marked my 14th anniversary with WordPress. 

14 years.   Untold amounts or wordspills and drivel, with nuggets of gold buried in the muck.   (I was blogging before WordPress, so there are even more years of drivel to wade through if you ever go digging for crap to bury me with.)

Highlights: I wrote (and published) two books in that time span.  One of those books was literally started as Serial chapters here on the blog.   (and for those curious, I make about $0.20/month from that book still.  LOL    Yeah, thats gonna make me rich and famous!  ROFL     Not concerned about it, not why I wrote it.) 

I have traveled all over the place in the lower 48 during that time, and not as a touring Audio dood like a previous chapter, but seeing the country and interacting with people.  

I ‘discovered’ kayaking, and learned an ancient method of building such; using anthromorphic measuring.    This translated into other skills and I have become even better in my regular J.O.B.    In essence, I learned that acccuracy is relative, in most instances.

While I have been all over the lower 48, I have also been deep into INTERNAL SEARCHES as well.    And those searches are bearing fruit: namely, “Its all fake and ghey Bullshit”    Yah,, that sums it up nicely.    Or another way.   Love yourself and those around you, let the haters go.    OR, as brudda B says every once in awhile, “Don’t sweat the petty shit, and don’t pet the Sweaty shit.”

14 years.    I never said I was the fastest learner in the pool of fish.   Still just a fingerling playing in the shallows, trying to not get “Et up” by the rest of the fish. 

14 years.   I turn 57 next week.  And something is telling me, it may be time to start the next chapter of my life.   I have been writing here through several chapters of my life, letting y’all have a glimpse along the way.   I don’t plan on stopping that effort.   BUT, time will tell, the page will turn, and LIFE will carry on as before.

Enjoy your Sunday, leading into “Happy Communists Day”, I’ll have a post up tomorrow with more thinks on that,,,   I’m hittin’ the water now.   Y’all take care.