This is my birth month and I have never liked it.   Not because of the birthing thing, but due to other factors.   Like currently at the J.O.B.,,, slow down time since everybody and their cousin are dealing with ‘Back to School’ and shifts in  programming scheduling: they tend to NOT want work done around their places at times like such.   So, we experiance this lull in work.

Add in Shit tons of rain and foul weather, Holiday daze,

Weak Week to say the leasts.    only sitting on 15 hours and tomorrow is payday,,,, BLECH!!!!

I can say, I saw it coming and made pre-emptive actions accordingly.  Already paid 3 of my 6 bills for the month and can slack a little if need be (that is to say, not pay AS MUCH as usual, but still more than minimum.)

I just don’t like this month,,,   Things start the fall shift in this month, really gaining speed in October, but you can see them now.   I’ve always been a spring/summer soul, and the ‘little death’ of fall winter always makes me a little melancholy, even depressed at times.   Yah, yah,, I know “to everything a cycle of seasons” and all that, but that don’t mean I hasta like it!!!  (and thing I miss from SoCal,, There were seasons, but the shifts were so subtle to this northern boy, that it may as well have been year long summer to me.)(Chances of return to SoCal? NIX-NIL, NEIN!    Until that area can get its collective shit together and oust the eaters in the north OUT, and fix things,,,,)

Yup, Northern boy by birth, but no place I can say I ever really felt I belonged.   Southern Pride, I get it, But I haven’t any, or not enough to claim Dixie as my own.  Hell, I’ve been the rolling stone for far too long, never finding that comfort zone.    Out west was the closest and coastal was almost right, but I was still running on adrenaline and testosterone then: No time to settle.  (and note, I didn’t and still have no love of LA,  I was Orange County where people still had some semblance of sanity.)

Only one facet of comfort has ever been the common denominator: WATER.    Has to have the water near at hand or I am lost,,,     Phoenix as a trial for me the year and half I lived there.   Only thing I found enjoyable there was the heat, but seeing stagnate water sitting in the drainage canals depressed the everloving shit out of me.    Yes, thats what those canals in that city are, DRAINAGE, because when it eventually rains there, that water has to go somewhere.  Thats why you see bridges in the middle of the desert: Flash Flooding is no joke.

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Last night as I was laying down, the smell of rain coming through my window was heavenly.   One of my favorite lakes has the best smelling water I have ever experianced: almost that sharp tang of chlorinated water, but without the chlorine bite.  My sister experianced that when she went kayaking with me the once.   It can’t really be descibed, must be ‘in person’ to get the power of it.   CLEAN is what it advertises, not the slightly fishy smell of most fresh water tribs. 

I love the smell of saltwater too.   Not the tidal spills of the southern coast of the lower 48 so much, but the actual saltspray of the coast.    The tidal spillsI tend to have a sewage smell to them; one recalled well from my days on Parris Island; with all its attending memories LOL    Nothing like a 20 mile boots and utes with full gear hump on a lowtide morning: some waste water treatment plants smell better.

I guess thats why coast front property is so damned expensive while the tidal property is ‘easier’ (though still outrageous compared to my current digs.)

My absolute best memory of coastal living was in North Carolina.   I rented (off season) 1/2 a duplex on Emerald Isle while I was in ‘school’ at Courthouse Bay (Camp LeJuene). Had a wife and kid that wanted to stay with me and the school had no facilities for a punk ass PFC and his kin, so I was granted a small priviledge.    Still had to maintain my barracks status, but I digress.   That house was on coast line (beach front at that) exactly east west.   I could catch sunrises over the water in the morning, and sunsets over water in the evening.  It only worked out that way in the winter months, but it was frellin’ AWESOME.   

And I didn’t know kayaks then,,,   sigh

of all my regrets, and I have a few, finding kayaking so late in life is one.   There is so much to learn about such a simple boat, and a younger me would have explored that realm so much easier than this over the hill beat up carcass I am hauled around in now.    Can’t change history like that, can we?  

Up north, the Inuit will shortly begin putting up the boats for the year.   I won’t, but I will be pulling out the gear for cold water immersions.   I may never need it for that, but it does keep my warmer and drier than my summer stuff.  Even with this having been a slack year for kayaking, I still fly with a boat in the racks.   You just never know when that moment will hit.  

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As you can tell, I haven’t much to talk about right now.   The whole poly-ticks scene is right out as it makes not one lick of sense.    The economy scene is right out as well since we are now in the gravitational pull of currency implosion.  (Look around, you’ll see the signs if you ignore what you are being told vs what is actually happening.) Most of the news is pure distraction as is, and I don’t even want to dive into the rabbit hole of the mulit/fluid gendered insanity.  Yes, its INSANITY and I refuse to see it as anything but now.  I do pity those that were sucked in, but I despise those that sold that bill of bads.

I’m just trying to get along in life and get myself into a position where I can make a move when such time allows.   Where, dunno, don’t care, just want it to happen smoothly, and that requires much simplification on this end of it.   “emptying the cup” again, trim the fat, lighten the load.   

I’ll try to find something less down and maybe more ‘life’ oriented for my next post.    Y’all take care.

Live

Learn

Laugh

Love

LOAD

even LLM’s have some common sense (I t’ink,,, LOL) (note: one spoken number per second would be 11 1/2 days,,, )

Live

LOVE

LAUGH

LEARN

LOAD

4 false starts this AM,,, I don’t really know what I want to say.   May be not enough coffee in the bloodstream…

With all the deep diving I have been into on the religious sides of things, then trying to switch over to something quasi-political,,,   hmmmph,   Let me spell it out how I see it.    ALL OF THE ABOVE might have been good ideas at one time under thier original thinkers, but they have all been co-opted for one purpose: CONTROL.    Now, I must clarify, Marx was a Nuckin’FutJob from the word go IMO.    I’ve read his shit and wonder how anyone could read it and think “this guy is onto something” unless they were closet tyro’s themselves.   Yeshuah, Buddha, the others: Great ideas, stolen and ran with by Tyros.  

Proof is in the puddin’, right?    Since the Red Revolution of Russia to now, Communism/Socialism has killed more people than all the wars of the same time frame.   And only ONE is still ‘functional’ but only by emulating Capitalism.   Cuba is NOT a good example for showing ‘the glory of Communism’, and the proof of that is the media blackout of what is really going on, on tha island.   Oh, information can be found, if one wants to dig for it, but most people are too entrenched in their lives and want someone else to ‘tell it’ to them.  

hmm,,, that lines up well with the whole co-opting religion thing.  And we have had 2000+ years of that, ain’t we?  

“Only those willing to seek the truth,  will know the truth.”

All others will be lead like sheep to the slaughter, and hoo-boy have we had slaughter the last 120 years/2000years.

I’m gonna spin this out a different way.   EVERYTHING IN MODERATION    Much like I found with ‘Green Energy’, Communism can work in small form factor.   Tribalism is about as close as you can get to that.    Everyone working for the whole, no one getting more than ‘fair share’.  Or as the communists creed states, From each according to ability, to each according to need.    (question: Who decides?   Answer that and you start to see the veneer flaking off.)   Green Energy can work for extremely localized needs, like a single household or small farm.   Communism could work in the same way.  Its when you start trying to Scale up that things go all wonky.   Green energy isn’t stable enough to provide the ups and downs of massive infrastructure, Communism loses the cobalt rod of self integrity found in small communities.

yes, I’m a little scatterbrained right now.

I recently stumbled over a video of Two AI discussing a solution to Capitalism without being socialist.   I have yet to watch the entirety of it, but I have already found on issue with it.  HUMAN NATURE.    See, true free market capitalism operates on rules that are naturally based, and Human Nature is what drives those rules.   WE DO NOT HAVE FREE MARKET CAPITALISM no matter what modern economists wanna call it.  We are very much a socialist oriented market these days, with 1/3 or the population on some form of welfare, another 1/3 being on workfare, and maybe half of the last third being the entreprenur that DRIVES free market capitalism.    If that doesn’t make sense to you, please, READ A BOOK(free copy if you want one.), and until it does make sense, Your arguments are bunk.

Human nature is why Communism can never work: people are not cogs or widgets to be moved around and replaced as needed.   We don’t ‘work’ like that.  No one fits any specific niche created by the communist machine.  It will limp along for awhile,  but it WILL fail!!!

One thing about the US Constitution: It does describe a machine, gives a blueprint for it even.   BUT, that machine is only for the Government,, NOT THE PEOPLE.    And yet, that Machine has grown til now, so that its infested everyday life around us.    It shows in how our country went from a Free Market system in the late 1800’s to the growing socialist construction we live under today.    All centered around that little amendment to the Constitution in 1917.

It’s always about control.    points that show such.  CENSORSHIP.   REGULATIONS.   TAXATION.

and thats just a start: the tools get more insidious as the infection grows.

But we Celebrate it in disguise.   We lift a beer and a burger in celebration of “labor”,,,  

note, we never raise a beer and burger to “CRITICAL THINKING”,,,,   just sayin’,,,

more laters,,,

This week marked my 14th anniversary with WordPress. 

14 years.   Untold amounts or wordspills and drivel, with nuggets of gold buried in the muck.   (I was blogging before WordPress, so there are even more years of drivel to wade through if you ever go digging for crap to bury me with.)

Highlights: I wrote (and published) two books in that time span.  One of those books was literally started as Serial chapters here on the blog.   (and for those curious, I make about $0.20/month from that book still.  LOL    Yeah, thats gonna make me rich and famous!  ROFL     Not concerned about it, not why I wrote it.) 

I have traveled all over the place in the lower 48 during that time, and not as a touring Audio dood like a previous chapter, but seeing the country and interacting with people.  

I ‘discovered’ kayaking, and learned an ancient method of building such; using anthromorphic measuring.    This translated into other skills and I have become even better in my regular J.O.B.    In essence, I learned that acccuracy is relative, in most instances.

While I have been all over the lower 48, I have also been deep into INTERNAL SEARCHES as well.    And those searches are bearing fruit: namely, “Its all fake and ghey Bullshit”    Yah,, that sums it up nicely.    Or another way.   Love yourself and those around you, let the haters go.    OR, as brudda B says every once in awhile, “Don’t sweat the petty shit, and don’t pet the Sweaty shit.”

14 years.    I never said I was the fastest learner in the pool of fish.   Still just a fingerling playing in the shallows, trying to not get “Et up” by the rest of the fish. 

14 years.   I turn 57 next week.  And something is telling me, it may be time to start the next chapter of my life.   I have been writing here through several chapters of my life, letting y’all have a glimpse along the way.   I don’t plan on stopping that effort.   BUT, time will tell, the page will turn, and LIFE will carry on as before.

Enjoy your Sunday, leading into “Happy Communists Day”, I’ll have a post up tomorrow with more thinks on that,,,   I’m hittin’ the water now.   Y’all take care.

Fun fact: Football season started.  How do I know?   My messenger has been beeping all day long as Kayaky Friends are discussing the games on today,,,

I honestly couldn’t give a fig leaf about it.  Never been a football person, or a sporty person for that matter.   Bicycle races when a teen, were more my speed, then in recent years, watching kayak races, like this one.

What Jess can do on moving wild water STILL blows my mind,,,   And I learn so much just watching and extrapolating what is going on UNDER the deck (she has the advantage of hips, but the control of legs and hip have just as much to do with controlling the  boat as the upper body and paddle do.)

But yeah,,, Football season has kicked off and I’m like ‘yawn,,, and?”  LOL

I must be broken.   Here is why I say that.   I spent this evening playing with Grok, not for conversation but as a research assistant.    ChatGPT just wasn’t hitting the mark for me (more on that later)   Grok on the other hand has been unleashed and the questions I asked were not just answered (VERY FRIGGIN WELL AT THAT) but backed by links of research, LISTS of links,,, Once question came back with over a 100 links of historical evidence.   It would take me weeks to find that amount of information.   

Good or bad thing?    Good for now, but it could be bad as well.   I know when I was in HS, and had to do research papers for classes, I was required to list my source, in detail.   Y’all that grew up then know of what I speak, but for the young’uns, that means that I had to list the source; book, paper, news source, whatever, what page it was found on, the dates of publication, even the Dewey numbers.   And we would have to ‘pull quote’ for validity as well.      This took TIME, LOTS OF TIME.   

In three questions, Grok pulled enough source material to fill a thesis,,,    Took about 20 minutes and most of that was my typing questions.   That first question took the longest to answer but it was quite a deep one, and it brought forth the most links.       It could be bad because I didn’t ‘pay my dues’,   I know I won’t remember any of those links, I didn’t follow them, just read the synopsis Grok generated to evaluate my next question.     So, yah, it could be a bad thing as well.  

BUT, I think its also a good tool to firm up or dissolve ‘theories’ or thought lines.   I can now say that one thing that was in my head has been dissolved because Grok pointed out there was some semantic tom-foolery in place.   (Persian Bible, if you are curious. It is Persian, it ain’t a bible,,,)

Its a tool.   the more I play with them, the more I see that very aspect, not the “goonna replace everybody” hype that is being spread.    The Skilsaw certainly didn’t replace carpenters, and the computer didn’t replace secretaries. (though, AI might,,,   Its certainly easier to call help desk and deal with AI over some robotic voice that asks for numeral entries to direct your call,,, Ask me how I know that one!)   

Deep dive tonight, and yes, I will be putting up another page on that new page, just not tonight.  More thinks involved and I wanna look through those links for reinforcement of my argument (which I think is valid, currently, but I could be wrong: hence, why I am not writing it out yet.) 

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Didn’t do much today, cleaned house, cleaned the yard of random clutter that Cozzie has dragged in as ‘toys’ (he aint’ happy with me right now.  I took those toys to the burnpile and did what you do there.  He watched the whole time, pouting,,,   He still has purchased toys, just not piles of trash,,,)   Started to mow, but realized I couldn’t see where I had just mowed so why bother,,,   Next week.   I won’t have the new batteries in until the 9th, so another weekend free ahead of me. (Free-ish,,, I’m sure I will get caught up in something,,,Buffalo is still running, but thats not to say she won’t feel left out on the money spending thing. )

Speaking of Buff: she crossed the 330000 mile mark today.   Another month and she will be 1/3rd of a million miles on the clock.     Old Girl is mindblowing to me.   She’s only 23 FFS!   Shes been to the moon and back and is making a repeat trip.

Tomorrow was slated to be domestics day, but I think I am going to hold off ’til Muhnday.   Sleep in, maybe hit the lake, zen out for a day.   No dawgum, no kittums, just Ol Dio and Mama-Nature.  Take a tarp to keep ol Sol offa my sensitive hide when I find ‘my spot’.    Will see.

Y’all take care and enjoy the long weekend.  

Live

LOVE

Laugh

Learn

LOAD

The Universe slows down, things equalize pressure, materials fail,,,

It just is,,,  

Had to order new batteries today for the Homestead.   NOT CHEAP!!!    The ones I have are failing. BAD failing.   Lights went out on me around 10oclock last night when the volt level dropped below nominal.     And I decided since I must spend the dineros, get an upgrade.   I went with LiFePO4 batteries this time.   My charge controller is built for several compositions of battery, so no new gear needed to handle the new bank.   They will be here in a week and until then, I don’t push the system  in place.    Its charging today and the lights came back on already (ehich I immediately turned off.)  The only thing I leave running is the ceiling fan.  Small load and batteries do charge better if they have some load on them.   Don’t ask me; I don’t understand it, just know it works.

I’ll get some of my money back when I recycle the current bank.   Not much mind you, but some.

My biggest gripe is that some of that headway I have been making on debts was just brought back.   Dangit!!!   C’est la vie, eh?   Good thing, LiFE batteries have a 10 year expected lifespan, not the 4-6 years of Lead Acid.   So maybe it will balance out.   The last set of LA’s (current set actually) are only three years old and I am not at all happy they are failing: thats a large part of why I decided to make the switch.   Note: I have a LiFe battery that I purchased to run my radio when I was still big into RC stuff.  That battery is STILL fully charged after 6 years sitting on the shelf.   The things are safer than LiPO, and longer lived.

they ain’t cheap though.

FWIW, This is how I pay my utilities.   Large chunks with nothing in between, where most people are paying monthly.   (Technically, I am paying monthly too, since I put the bloody things on a credcard. BUT, that bill will be paid off long before they fail and need replaced.)   The upside being, usually, I don’t have to worry about power failures.  

CON: if SHTF, lights can be seen for MILES, and having power is a big indicator that someone is better off than you are.   Light discipline must be practiced when things get sporky.

PRO: if SHTF, being able to barter ‘battery charging’ for other things is possible.   Many people will have batteries that need charged up, whether thats tool batteries or old car batteries to ‘keep the lights on’.   (honestly, I would need to triple my battery bank and solar collection to be able to handle that scenario.  I run at the cusp of my Needs, with only the ‘fudge factor’ of foul weather built in.   )

As for that Entropy thing,,, I don’t see the world falling apart so low that things like batteries become unobtanium.  Not saying it can’t happen, I just don’t see it happening.   Even in the darkest parts of the dark ages, society kept on, people made things, blacksmiths still ran forges,  farmers kept tilling and bakers were making breads,,,

We’ve come a long way since then, and our technology is more complicated, but I just can’t see it failing below a certain level without serious Devastation and loss of life that would put our species on the endangered list.    (we’ve been there once before according to anthropologists/geneticists, and we came back .)

What would that take?   World wide EMP’s to kill everyones power production means.  If the power is knocked down, our means are kaput.  We are instantly knocked back into pre-1700’s technology.  The die offs from the collapse of JITD (just in time delivery) will create issues of their own and the plagues from infrastructure collapse will take out even more.   No running water or sewage create problems of thier own, and our sewage treatment plants are energy pigs.

I sometimes wonder if that isn’t the goal of certain groups running this planet.  But I digress.

Knowing how to do things is only part of keeping oneself upright and breathing if such were to occur.    Luck is gonna play a large part too.  Being in the right spot with certain others will too.  (call that luck as well, but it can be mitigated to some extent with forthought.)

yah, my thougths turn dark when I am dealing with keeping my homestead running, when it wants to fall apart on me.

Funny, I’m talking about how failure of infrastructure and logistics will be BAD, but not even touching on the human aspects.    When things get really rough, the animal side of people will come roaring back.   As I was discussing with a guy at the grocery, “You wanna see how close we are to Animals, go to a Wallyworld on Black friday.”   And thats MILD compared to what could be.

sigh,,,,

Dark thoughts, Cold morning, too much time on my hands, Too much money spent to keep the lights on.     Grey and gloomy thinks,,,  

Days like today remind me of how close we are to tipping over that edge into chaos.   Its quite a thin veil.   And I know many apocalyptic Prn books illustrate it quite well.   I don’t see those books as entertainment so much as INSTRUCTIVE, at least in a theoretical sense.   WE don’t know what is coming, so we LOAD up for what ever we can and hope for the best.   PREPPERS, right?   I call it insurance.  And the best place to start prepping in in your head; get knowledge and learn to think tactically.

Remember always, the rule of 72.   72 hours into a large disaster is when you will see the TRUE ANIMAL called HomoSapiens, not the docile domesticated version we are so used to dealing with.

Anywhoos,,, its Satyrday, a three day weekend (despite my begging to let me work,,, I has stuff to do,,,) and ZERO PLANS in place.   

LIVE

Learn

Laugh

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I know I’ve been down this road a time or three here on the blog.  

I figured out some of whats been bugging me about getting out: kayaking, camping, what have you.    I have way too much time on my hands where I am completely SOLO.   Be it on the job, where I am “IT” doing the repairs, putting out the fires, programming stuff, you name it: Just little ol Me.

Then I get home and its four footed furries to keep me company and they ain’t the greatest for conversation if you know what I mean,,,

So when the weekend comes around and I want to get out, the ‘meh’ hits hard because its more of the same: SOLO.

Y’know, you can only look into the abyss for so long before the abyss starts staring back,   Scratch that; GLARING back,,,  Introspection is a wonderful tool, but like everything in life, Moderation is key, and I have had quite a fill of introspection the last few years.    I found that I like who I am, even if there are some rough spots still, but they make me the character people know; not bugs, but features so to speak.   I have looked into the shadow side of myself and come to terms with that, keep some of it locked away until such time as it might be needed, but know “This is Me” and accept that fact willingly.   (yes, there is a horror show side of me that still exists, locked up tight, but ready to be unleashed should circumstances dictate.   Think every horror torture the Native Americans came up with, like the blood eagle, and you have some idea of that shadow.  )

Yah,, I just wanna spend time shootin’ the breeze with someone that has some vocabulary behind their eyes.   And knowing that hitting the water or campsite isn’t likely to generate that “why bother” comes into play.  

But Dio, you might meet someone to talk to if you go; staying home means that CAN’T happen,,,

Yeah,,, trust me, that internal conversation has happened more than I could count. Issue there: I’m an introvert.  Opening up, even a little, to complete strangers is EXTREMELY DIFFICULT.

Is what it is,,,     Friends have their lives too, and as I ‘jokingly’ said at camp one time.  “The difference between adulthood and childhood.  Schedulting work or scheduling downtime with friends..   Kids get work schedules, Adults have to schedule fun stuff like camping.”

Funny that I don’t have to worry about scheduling stuff like Kayaking, or camping, (IF I do it solo), but still have to work schedules for meetups.    Almost like I am on that cusp of adult/big kid.   

We grow up, get out of school, become adults, then hit the age where we have the time to do what we want, and no one to do it with,   

LIFE

LOL  I guess it depends on how you look at it for the pro’s and con’s of each stage.     Somehow, it all works out though.     Most of us don’t end up going postal or shooting up churches.

And on that note,,,,,,,, the recent shooter,   I don’t even want to name a name or place a face to the shitstain,,, BUT, I did see one hell of a Meme that summed it all up the best.   “If you see an apple, they have a banana”    This TRANS shit is out of hand.   We have had Crossdressers since time out of mind, and until Xi-Den and Oblammy, it was just a fringe thing and people didn’t give much notice.    NOW, we are supposed to recognize them as “NORMAL”, not the laughing stock or eccentric of yore.  

NO

NO

NO

I’m done playing that game and I WILL laugh in your fucking face or even openly state slurs in your direction.   

Added later

TWO GENDERS: Male    Female.    If you wanna be nueter, your bizz, you wanna pack fudge, YOUR BIZZ, but keep it to consensual adults, behind closed doors, and DO NOT TRY TO FORCE THE REST OF THE WORLD INTO YOUR WANNABE IMAGE.        Don’t expect special treatment because you are sick in the head.   We used to lock people away for mental illness, and that went the wayside in the 90’s.  Things have been getting progressively crazier and crazier ever since.

Maybe its best that I stay solo most times.

Opinionated Ornery rat bastage that I am.  One with a beast locked up tight in the recesses of my soul.  

Live

Laugh

LOVE

LEARN

LOAD

(PS, EDITED for typos and missing words for clarity.)