Fits of Depression
yeah, ME, having a fit of depression,,,
Not what started it but some of the reasoning behind it. Yah, those that are still saying we have ‘fair and honest elections’ need to open their fucking eyes and see that all the shenaniganss are fucking THEM as well. Those that desire power don’t give a truck about you or your desires, they only want MORE and MORE and MORE, and you are the vehicle that gets them there: along with every damned tombstone in the US.
The time of year helps not at all. I always take a meloncholy turn when the leaves fall.
And more than once, the thoughts of shutting this blog down have broached my forebrain. Lots of reasons, most stemming from the fact that I rarely have much to add to the fray these days. Ever since Gerard passed on, and BIll Buppert went Dark, my writing has become more the personal thing. Gerard was the only ‘Big Name’ blogger that communicated (email and once via phone.) with me on the regular. Francis does through comments (here and at his place), BIll never has, though I do know one piece I wrote was mentioned in one of his essays (so I know I was being read by him). 2012, the year my blog was injured by nefarious peeps and has never recovered. And admittedly, I pretty much gave up at that point. Too much infighting, black hat actors, and dog eat dog attitudes from most. When one was found to be a ‘glowie’, instead of rallying forces, the majority ran for cover to protect themselves and left the target exposed. No solidarity of principles, even though all harp on ‘principles’.
Live and let live.
and slowly but surely, the blog morphed into a kayaks and kittehs blog, with the occasional philosophical/political bend. And my walls have grown taller, trust but verify has become Verify and maybe trust, and friends are scattered amongst the weeds of the world and can be counted on one hand. NOT JUST the blogger friends, but IRL ones.
For an introvert, thats not that horrible. BUT, I am a borderline introvert, sometimes called an Ambi-vert,,, I still need some social interaction on the regular. (Some, NOT A LOT, and usually need a day or three to recharge my batteries before I can continue.) I miss people over time, and the loss of Gerard and his insights is weighing on me today. A voice I could really use to hear at this juncture of history. (thanks to The New Neo for keeping his essays alive. You’re doing damned good Jean!)
This is all illusions, but damned persistent Illusions,,, It gets hard to tell the difference between reality and illusion, when your avatar is your vehicle and interface in this play. And that there are billions other avatars running around this illusion adding thier input, really mucks with things,,,,
Time to get the boat wet, get my ground and center going and try my damndest to not let the little shit get so deep under the skin. Like splinters (fiberglass splinters are the worst) they irritate and demand so much attention, the details of everything else take hindteat. I need to get out there and find, and pull, some splinters. They are festering and thats a no good.
Live
Laugh
LEARN
LOAD.
Dio's Workshop 
Mornin’. Hope yer ‘Church’ day goes very well for ya! Wish I could do a ‘Church’ day as well, but I’m right in the middle of prepping 600 (150 done) new Norma 308 brass, & can only do about 1 hour at a time. So it takes longer than it should, but it can’t be helped (*&&^^%$$#ing injuries😡). This Norma stuff is $$, but after seeing the quality it’s well worth it. A good bit of the steps I do are already done. Gonna use ’em to test some SMK & TMK boolits, and a couple powders.
I concur with yer “Fair and Honest Elections” observations.
I’m a big fan of Mr Van der Leun meself. Wish he were still around – Ol’ Remus, too. Also, Francis & Bill are very talented. I still read quite a few others as well. Ain’t easy to remain positive & cautiously optimistic, though (as you well know). I also lean toward being introverted. I could give a f*ck less about *most* peopleez, as well.
I do appreciate yer observations – about most everything. The catz & kayaks are cool. Not a cat person meself, but I do like reading about yerz & their adventures. I gotta admit – somma yer stuff has caused me to think in other directions than usual, due to either not having been interested in them, or not actually considering those particular things. Mikee likes it!🍻🥂
Nuff said fer now. Gotta admit, Looking/not looking forward to Tuesday mornin! I’d prefer for it not to be an ‘interesting’ mornin. Y’all keep the 5th L in mind, too! I know I am.
Y’all take care,
Mike in FLA.
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November 2, 2024 at 9:09 am
I feel your pain Dio… Lately it’s just all been too much. Suffering from “Information” overload, but it all seems to be hyperbole or flat out lies. I’m contrarian and distrustful by nature, yet simultaneously a reluctant optimist. I want to believe there is “hope” for our people and our nation, on the other hand the ‘punk rock kid’ still living in my head leans toward accelerationism and thinks it ALL needs to come crashing down or we’ll never see any improvement whatsoever.
I’m no fan of DJT either, but I’ll freely admit life was much better with him at the helm than its been the last 4 years. Nevertheless I wholeheartedly believe IF he wins and IF ‘they’ allow him to take office – two mighty big IFs – we’re in for 4 more years of lawfare and obstruction, riots and unrest and more destruction of “the American Way”. I’m of a mind that just tearing the band aid off, while painful, is ultimately what we need. The blind need to feel some discomfort.
The family and I just did a 3 day camping trip down in the mighty Redwoods of Big Sur last week and it was the first time in MONTHS that I wasn’t totally on edge. I haven’t posted to my blog in ages and rarely comment at my regular stops anymore, not wanting the let Mr. BITTERMAN out of his cage. Music has lost its appeal. No desire for catching waves… The psyche is such an amazing thing, yet surprisingly fragile… I keep spitting out the black pills due to the bitter taste, but sometimes think “couldn’t be worse than what we’ve got now”.
Yeah, I think the depression is getting its claws in me…
On the bright side, at least all those God forsaken political ads will be gone tomorrow!!
Thanks for the dose of reality and letting me know I’m not the only one…
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November 5, 2024 at 5:18 pm