a little honesty

(with ones-self)

Talked about ‘Seek the Good’, and I stand by that, and I know in this day and age, its damned difficult.   I try, daily, to keep the balance of sanity while it seems the world is crashing.   Well, It is,,,   but it never goes away.   What comes after may be better, and the only way to get ‘Better’ is to envision it and make efforts towards such in your own small world you control.

Thats my biggest problem with Burnout.    I know ‘you can’t change people’, I know it know it know it.   I can’t say I am trying to change him; in fact, I am pulling back quite a bit these days.   All due to his actions, or lack of, more specifically.   I say ‘Dood, you really need to make an appointment with a dentist.” and he agrees and nods, and

nuthin’ happens.  No dentist appointment, no doc appointment, nothing.   Just ‘more Ibuprofen’ and ‘he’s ok’ for a little longer.   The boy has wisdom teeth that are coming in cockeyed and causing MASSIVE ear infections, and he won’t do a damned thing to better himself, even while in agony.  

Nope,,, not going to waste my breath.   His history he has shown us at the J.O.B. tells me the same thing,,, He talks a lot, but nothing changes EVEN IF ITS IN HIS BEST INTEREST AND HE KNOWS IT.  

You can’t fix stoopid,,,   He’s no dummy, has a bit of a brain upstairs when he chooses to use it, but his WILL and DRIVE are broken, or something.   

SO I question something here: Is this a case of our modern world and the war on White Males?   I know that has been ongoing for many years now, and is really showing its head in the younger crowds.   Young men so broken down by the myths indoctrinated in them, that they see no point in trying.   No spines.  No drives.  

Yeah,,, broad brush application here, as there are some that come out of the schools swinging and ready to take on the world, but they are a VERY SMALL percentage,,, Maybe even a fraction of one. (and most all are out of private/catholic/homeschool,,, NOT public, goverment funded indoctrination centers.)

Back to Burnout: I’ve spent a couple of days thinking about this.   His asking me to take him kayaking spurred the thoughts, and trying to figure a way to decline, NICELY, lead to many mental conversations, gaming different tactics.    And I keep coming back to “You need to focus on improving your life situation before you go adding FUN that you can neither afford nor access without being dependent on me.”  

And I point the finger back at myself at that point, saying: “I didn’t just happen to have a home and the stuff I own: I worked my tail off for what I have, even if that work was me busting knuckles to build boats, for a hobby I enjoy.   NO ONE GAVE ME SQUAT!”

Life ain’t fair, and if someone is telling you otherwise, check for your wallet, because they are scamming you in other ways.   I want to help others, I want to teach, BUT, I don’t want to waste my time when its obvious that the ‘target’ has the self preservation sense of a domestic turkey in a spring shower.(not a myth,,, saw two drown that way when I was a kid.  We ate turkey for weeks,)

I’m seeking the good in this,,, Not really seeing it as yet, but nothing happens in this little world of mine by accident, not really; there is always some lesson involved.   His are obvious.   Mine is much more obscure.

Keep on livin’