Shattered keystones

Break a keystone on a bridge (especially the old Roman Arches type) and down she comes.

Spent the weekend in heaven and hell and part of the hell reason was a shattered keystone. My ego took a hit.

The heaven was friends.

Its damned hard to let ego bash you into a pulp when friends are figuratively jerking you upright by your bootstraps.

To elaborate; some of my regular readers know that before the Covidiocy, I had major dental work done and ended up with full dentures. I’m still not 100% with them and my introversion didn’t help because I continued to dwell on the self-image thing.

Well,,, long story short, a flubbed roll (many possible reasons including a wind gust and my not knowing I was moving sideways because I was inverted, but no excuses, I missed it, three times!!!) and my spotter having a hard time getting to me, when I finally was at the surface, my top denture plate, was not. Three of us spent an hour or more wiggling toes in the mud trying to find that plate. I was embarassed as hell. I rarely tell anyone that my “killer smile” is due to False teeth, and suddenly, ‘my little secret’ was on public notice.

I found true friends. They refused to let me wallow in self pity, they demanded I ‘man up’ because ‘shit happens’. They insisted on many things and I was able to open up doors that have been triple locked and wedged closed for several years. I was still self conscious, mostly because of the ‘talking funny’ thing, and eating became interesting again. But I stayed. I had packed up to leave, but after consideration, the friendships that slammed my shattered keystone back in place (still a little wobbly. But its holding) I came up with a plan to attempt recoverying that plate again. I went to the store and bought a gigantic landing net and this morning, before the boats really started moving, I went back out in that lake and did my damndest to ‘sweep ‘ that area up.

Sadly, I did NOT recover my teeth. But my self conciousness of it was not as problematic. I did note that an old habit came back in force though. I was covering mouth when laughing again. Not a habit I have missed.

So, normal return home, dig out my temporary plates and do a reline on them for the interim. Calling to schedule a dentist appointment at soonest convenience and spending even more money on myself. These work, but they don’t fit right (they are meant to get you through the healing process and your gums change shape quite a bit over that process.) Want to talk to the Doc about implants or something to help ‘lock’ the plates in. And not just for self-image reasons, but financial ones as well. Things I do can get rough, and I have coughed, sneezed and sang my teeth out on an occasion or two. I’d like to limit those chances. Spend a little now save more over the long run, is my thinking. Note, the plates I had (still have and using the lower) are $1000/each. Featherlite types, not cheap cornerstore choppers. Stupid screwups like saturday get pricey FAST.

So, add all that into my unsettled status, and a little thinking about things and my reasons for holding the line where I am get hammered on pretty hard. The house has been the cornerstone of my last 12 years, but the ‘bridge’ is in entirely the wrong location, and its footings on the banks are shit.

Its time to go, I just need to find the right path. And I have a better idea of the possible territories I’m headed into now.